Wednesday, October 17, 2012

Reluctant to Stereotype

I had a daughter. (Well, DH & I had a daughter.) We gave her dolls and stuffed animals and girly stuff, and she seemed to like them. When she was five, she liked the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles. Well and good. We got her many TMNT action figures. I don't know if she every really played with them or if she was exhibiting DH's collection mania. When uninformed people said that they were "boy's toys," she, and we, said she could play with whatever she liked, so long as it didn't result in even temporary damage to her (no roller blades!) or the house (no finger paints). When she presented the world with our grandson, I had to adjust my thinking somewhat: he could have stuffed animals, but he also liked cars (toys and the movies), footballs and other "boy's toys." So now, my grandson has a little sister. The first year, toys were easy: soft baby toys, books, balls, etc. But she's over 18 months now. I want to give her girly stuff like baby dolls or play kitchen stuff (can you say "stereotype?") Don't worry. Her parents already gave her a toy "computer," pink, like her Mommy's. But I don't want to make her fit into just a girl's mold. Do I get her cars and trucks? Her big brother already has a ton of those, and he'd likely take them away to play with them anyway. Do I give her girly stuff, and, as she grows, let her think that Grandma is limiting her? So what do you think? Shall I just get her what I think she might like, figuring that she, like her mother, will request what interests her? Or should I try to mix it up, even picking something that doesn't "light my fire" as a gift?

3 comments:

Catherine Pickrel said...

I say you get her something that helps her develop, challenges her, and/or assists in increasing her self-confidence.

Melissa said...

I grew up as a tomboy and played with Voltron (pre-power rangers), G.I. Joe, and he-man. Even now, I can hold an indepth discussion on college football that astounds most men. Yet, I am a girly-girl who has salon treatments and reads romance books.

I know what you mean about the sudden desire to buy girly items. Both of my nieces have received gender-neutral gifts from me, yet when Erin had Baby E, I bought all pink items. Me, the woman who detests pink.

I say give her a girly gift if the desire is there. I'm sure her mother will share stories of grandma buying her TMNT figures.

Catherine Pickrel said...

Looking back, you know she loves books and puzzles! Anything that gets her hands busy.